The Bandwagon

5.07.2014


Facebook.
Twitter.
Skinny jeans.
Harry Potter.
Disqus.
Smartphones.
Frozen.

That's just a short list of the things that at one point in the not-so-distant past (and let's be honest: the current present) that I refused to buy, watch, read, and wear because everyone else was doing it, and I don't like jumping on the bandwagon. 

Call it hipster. Call it difficult. Call it stubborn.
The fact is: My refusal to do things that everyone else is doing is not a new character trait. 

Ever since I can remember, I've hated matching. Forget about group t-shirts. I'll bring a cardigan just so I can look a little bit different. Sometimes Jordan and I will accidentally dress in a similar color for church. I will then demand that one of us change. When I left my first real job, my coworkers played a brilliant prank on me involving my hatred of matching that was at once hilarious and super annoying. You could say it was the best prank ever.

At first, it starts with the principle of the thing: everyone is obsessed with it, so I don't want to do it. I only got a Twitter account last year. I waited years after my friends had all read and reread the Harry Potter series to finally dive in. I still haven't seen Frozen.

After the initial refusal, however, it becomes less about the principle of not jumping on the bandwagon and more about not doing it for actual reasons. Or, in some cases, doing it for an actual reason.

Sometimes, I eventually realize that I'm an idiot for continuing to hold out for basically no reason at all. Twitter is awesome. I like writing witty one-liners. Skinny jeans look good on me, and they're (shocker!) comfortable. The HP series is really, really good.

Other times, I'm not not doing something merely because I just haven't gotten around to it. Take Frozen, for example. I'm not opposed to watching it, but we don't really watch movies very often, and I don't have a kid, and I just haven't gotten around to it. The same with most popular TV shows. At first I didn't watch "Orange is the New Black" because everyone was obsessed with it. Then I just didn't get around to it because I'm currently on Season 5 of (ahem) One Tree Hill. I pretty much put on a cone of shame every time I turn it on. It's truly the stupidest show ever. But that's a post for another day.

The final category are things I've decided I legitimately don't want to do. It stops being about the bandwagon. I have (what I think are) legitimate reasons for not doing something. Example: I'm one of 5 people in the US who does not have a smartphone.* I talked about that when I wrote about the social media rabbit hole. It used to be about the fact that everyone had one. Now it's about the fact that I don't want one.
(*not a real stat but probably pretty close)

I'm not sure what it says about me that I usually decide I don't want to do something if everyone else is doing it. I feel like this must be a fatal flaw of mine, because to be honest, it annoys me. On the other hand, I definitely would not jump off a bridge just because everyone else was, so that's good.

Still, I know I have the potential of missing out on some things. Like the awesomeness of Harry Potter. Other times, I'm glad for it, because I've seen that "look up" video shared about 50 times in the last week, and I'm like, "Girl without a smartphone over here! I look up all the time! Come join me, won't you?"

Anyway, I know this is mostly a ramble. But I've been thinking about this topic a lot, both as it pertains to me personally and as it pertains to the things I do (or don't do) on this blog. Using Disqus, offering sponsorship, hosting giveaways, doing linkups... The list is almost endless. For the past 6 months or so I've been frustrated by my desire to "fit in" the blogging world by doing these things, even as I try to balance my desire to do my own thing and not care what anyone else is doing or says I should do.

So I guess here's my question:

-Do you refuse to do things just because everyone else is doing them?
-Do you find it hard to balance jumping on the bandwagon with the potential to miss out on awesome stuff?
-Where's the line between being stubborn and legitimately not wanting to do something?
Jodi said...

Haha I totally don't do certain things because everyone else is.. but sometimes I realize these things can be totally awesome and jump on too. Sometimes things people are obsessed over really aren't that great. And sometimes they totally are :)

Beka @ Sunshine to the Square Inch said...

balance! It's hard! If I'm super honest I'm guilty of jumping on the bandwagon and also being stubborn.
Disqus - I admit, I installed it because it seemed like the popular thing to do. However, I think it's easier and more functional. People can 'interact' with each other on comments and they get notified when that happens. I think it allows for better connections and community.
sponsorship - I thought it was really awesome and now I'm rethinking it. I'm still undecided and am constantly updating what I offer.
giveaways - I think it's fun to give things away to say thanks for being a reader! It's fun.
my wedding - since I was little (think junior high / early high school) I did not want to be the girl like everyone else and get married in a church. I always said I would get married at a lake and have jet skis. I ended up having two weddings and then a reception. It sure was different and I don't even know how to explain my wedding situation to people sometimes. Part of the weirdness was because Dave's Mom passed away and part of it was my weird idea about marriage. I'm still happy with how it turned out.
paleo - I'm never jumping on that bandwagon! I get so annoyed that everyone says how healthy it is when minimal scientific research has been done by actual researchers.
Harry Potter - never read them....
crossfit - as you know I do crossfit but sometimes I have a hard time because I'm not a die hard crossfiter through and through. I won't post jibberish things on my FB wall that only other CF people understand and I'm not going to post a picture of me every day getting slaughtered. I definitely feel like an odd ball in that group but yet I really enjoy it.

Wow! I just wrote a whole blog post but those are my random thoughts!

shelleystirs said...

Mike and I are part of the 5 who don't have smart phones.

Most of the time it doesn't matter to me what other people do or don't do. I try to gauge what is worth my time, energy, and money and make decisions based on those factors. But I don't like to miss out either; I like to at least be aware of the awesome stuff.

Unknown said...

I waited so long to jump on the HP bandwagon! I use to wait and refuse to get on board with different fads but not anymore. Now I like to try things early, decide if I like them and then jump off the bandwagon when it because cool ;)

Rachel Sedaker said...

My mind is blowing up with thoughts right now! I am like this in many ways. I resisted Harry Potter until I saw the first movie after it came out on DVD, then I devoured all the books that were out. Musically, however, I tend not to like some of the most popular "alternative" or "indie" artists- in part because people who claim to be different and original all rave about them (like Feist- I never liked her music), in part because I have more classic tastes (love me some oldies). I resisted Twitter til I started my blog, and now I love it- and might write a post on how it has impacted my life of late. But blogger trends? I've dabbled in some, and am super-resistant to others. I leave most of them because they feel cheap. In the end, I make sure that I'm being true to myself. I still haven't jumped on the Game of Thrones bandwagon- I saw the first episode, maybe the second, and wasn't too keen on all the naked women (if you're going to show me naked women, you better show me naked men too- equality, people). I also tried Orange is the New Black, but it wasn't my cup of tea. I guess it never hurts to try and decide it isn't for you?

Kristin said...

I try to balance it. I resisted smart phones for a long time because I had a perfectly good flip phone that never broke and got reception where smart phones didn't - and then I discovered Facebook and HAD to be on it constantly, and taking pictures, and...it all broke down. The same thing with Disqus. I hated having a system that made it hard for people to comment and for me to see who commented and who replied to my comments. I drag my feet until I see whether or not something makes sense. For a tech junkie, I am definitely not an early adopter!

Daleian said...

It is an embarrassing thing for me to admit but I said many times I wouldn't watch Vampire Diaries just because everyone else was so in love with it and I already had my share of vampire stuff. One day I secretly watched the first episode and realized I was just being stubborn and it wasn't worth missing out on.
Just like I know a lot of people that won't buy an Iphone because it's so popular.
Now, Frozen is a different thing! I wasn't super excited about it but once I saw it... Loved it! So happy to have given it a chance! :)

Bailie @ The Hemborg Wife said...

Wee another non smart phone person here!!! I am totally like this though and it used to bother my mom because she would want to get me things and I would be like no not that thing that everyone else has! I think for me though it is because of all the years of wearing a school uniform.

Unknown said...

I'm on season 5 of OTH as well!! It's so bad it's good:) I find it tough to balance this as well. I don't want to do things because everyone else is, but I also don't want to NOT do things because every else is. I also don't want to feel like a hypocrite when I try said thing and it's as amazing as everyone says. I'll let you know if I ever figure it all out:)

Ashley said...

I'm exactly like this. I have a Twitter, but I don't use it and I refuse to get a Snapchat because I don't like the premise. I haven't read the Harry Potter series and I only watched Frozen because my other "I hate the bandwagon friend" me decided to do it. I JUST got interested in Instagram and I finally bought a pair of TOMS. I wasn't always this way, but I used to want to fit in so bad in middle school (but never did) that by the time I hit high school I developed a contempt for it. It just wasn't worth the worry. My reasons for avoiding the bandwagon are slightly different, now. I just like to sit back and watch others go gaga over things. Now, if you can get ahead of the curve and get into something before it gets popular, THAT'S pretty cool.

The Lady Okie said...

Jordan likes to point out the fact that he liked GOT *way* before it was popular. We're talking, the second book was in hardback. He got me started on them before there was even talk of a TV show. The same thing with The Hunger Games. I read the books 2 years before there was a movie. Then I feel really special when everyone's obsessed, and I'm like, "yeah I totally knew about that already..." ha! Plus, I definitely am NOT keen on naked women. Reading about it is one thing, but seeing it... no.
I definitely find myself resistant to things just because everyone else loves it, and sometimes I find out that I really love it too! Other times I realize there's an actual reason I don't like it. (like smartphones) That's when it annoys when my friends all say I'm doing something just to be different. I'm like, no I have actual reasons!

Anyway, thanks for sharing your thoughts! I enjoyed reading them.

Jennie said...

I try to do what I want to do because I want to do it. I do jump on bandwagons just because I want to see what the hype is about, but if I don't love it, I won't continue. Breaking Bad hurt my heart, so I stopped watching it. Now I'm trying to watch Game of Thrones and it's boring and there are a lot of naked people in it, so I'm over it.

I will say that I started reading Harry Potter at the tender age of seven years old, so I'd like to say I hopped on that wagon before most. I literally grew up with it.

I'm a bandwagoner. But if I don't like it, then I don't keep participating in that activity just to fit in with others. I don't know what the point of this comment was.

Anonymous said...

I'm always behind on reading the current bestsellers, watching the TV show of the moment, and technology stuff. I still don't have Twitter and doubt I ever will. I just read Harry Potter this year.

I like to think that I'm letting other people work the kinks out of a product, see if it stands the test of time, and then I can start gracing it with my presence.

-Amy

Kristen said...

i love frozen! haha. when i was in high school, i didnt want to jump on the HP wagon because everyone else was, and i refused. I finally read it when I had read all of the required books for that year, and so glad i did. loved them! but i feel ya, i stay away from things that people love (50 shades, twitter, some tv shows)

Holly said...

I think you have a lot of really good points. I really hate the bandwagon people who jump at things THE MOMENT they get popular. Like bands and musicians--that bothers me. And sporting teams--I'm from Cleveland where we are FULL of bandwagon fans...not me tho, I'm a diehard fan ;) But, I digress. I didn't get a smartphone for *years* after they came out, and the only reason I did is because it was FREE for an upgrade to my plan. The newness wore off it pretty quickly, and now the majority of my apps are gone--I just have the most practical ones (and some fun ones, but not nearly as many as before). I guess what I'm saying is that I don't like jumping on the bandwagon. I wait and wait and wait to see if there's really a reason for me to like something that's so popular, and if I give in it's usually because I've justified it in some way. But it's usually a while after it's been popular.

Tamara said...

I've been known to deny certain things just because others are all about it. Skinny jeans being the main one. I also don't blog about things when everyone else seems to be doing that - like if something happens on the news or entertainment world. The only reason I'm all over Frozen now is I have a 3 year old. And it is constant. I also did read all the Harry Potter books until the last one came out - and the only reason that happened was because my husband surprised me by buying the book because he thought it looked like something I would like...so then I had to buy the first 6.

Ali said...

I refuse to buy or even think about booties with skirts or shorts. I think this is a horrible look, regardless of how popular the look may have been/still is. I will say that I love my skinny jeans (hello runner body, rock those skinny jeans!), and I tolerate my iphone. The iphone is useful, more than anything. But it stays in my purse when I'm out and about. I'm not cool enough to have constant text conversations or whatever the kids are doing these days.

Unknown said...

I am exactly the same way! And I like to think of it as the "principle of the matter". So much of what is popular and the the general public gloms onto is so "out there" or "inappropriate" that I tend to stay away on purpose, just because I know that's the way it usually rolls. Then eventually, I give in to SOME of it. But only after I see the fall-out or however you want to say that. Does that make any sense? Some of it turns out to be against my principles, so then I'm glad I didn't jump in and then won't ever participate. My parents are 2 of the 5 who do not own smartphones. They refuse. LOL I like to do the matchy-matchy thing with my husband on occasion, but other than that, I'm with you. Why do it JUST because it's deemed "cool" or "hip" by the general public? I don't get it.

Rebecca Jo said...

Good for you for being an individual....
We didn't have a smart phone until 2 years ago... & now, I feel dumber because of it :)

Courtney said...

For what it's worth, I think your blog is really awesome and you don't need to change a thing about it{unless you really want to!}

Kaysie said...

Slow clap.

I resist so many of the blog things too, mostly because I don't have the readership and I'm not only about that. There is such a community of bloggers who appreciate the realness without the bizness, so I think you're just fine. I'll keep reading. Althought, plug for Disqus, I just like it because I never forget anyone's comments because it sends notifications.

Not a Frozen fan. I have a Smartphone but I feel so typical being glued to it, I still prefer talking to strangers and reading and looking out windows :)

Rachel said...

So, it's probably fairly obvious, but I'm also not a go with the crowd type of person. Once in a while I give in (I, also, have decided that I look amazing in skinny jeans. :P )
Other times, my resolve is only strengthened with time. I won't have a smart phone as long as they keep making candybar phones--I have all the internet I need on my laptop.
I didn't get Facebook till 2010...and that's quite possibly the reason why I still enjoy staying in touch with my friends on there while seemingly everyone else is "over it".
I think life is interesting when there's a balance of similar and completely different passions and interests among people.

The Lady Okie said...

That's so nice of you to say :) Thanks, Courtney!

The Lady Okie said...

Oh my goodness yes! I am ALWAYS saying "it's just the principle of it." haha! Jordan and I have those discussions a lot.

The Lady Okie said...

I really do want to watch it! I just haven't gotten around to it. I'm sure it's really good. I've heard such great things about it.

LeAnna said...

I'm not a bandwagon gal, either. I prefer to ride my pony alongside, so that I may leave the circle of bandwagons at my choosing. Did I really just try to make an analogy out of that? I did. But really. I think it's possible to enjoy relevant things without abandoning ones self to them like some do. Like, my kids enjoyed Frozen but they don't wear clothing or underwear with Anna & Elsa plastered all over them. I mean, I liked vintage Pyrex before that was even a THING. ;) Miss ya, friend. We need to get together!

Love What You Do said...

Oh I totally avoid things (ie Facebook and Crossfit) because sometimes I just don't want to do things I dont' like just because everyone else is doing it. In this case, I don't feel like I am missing out but I did join Pinterest and love it! YOu've got me thinking about more things on my list...ha ha! We don't have a tablet and I really just don't understand twitter!

Christina @ The Murrayed Life said...

So somehow I hadn't heard of or seen that video... I guess that shows that I've been doing what it says and out of the social media loop?? Either that or my friends don't want to post it and make themselves feel bad for looking down so much. ;)

And I definitely get stuck not doing things just because I haven't done them and it's kind of become my identity. I still don't use Twitter, but that's more because I just don't see the need, and am almost always late on fashions, but that has to do with me not buying clothes. So I guess I have reasons behind my choices actually.

And that, my friend, was the most pointless comment ever. The end.

Alicia | Jaybird: Home in Motion said...

I tend to avoid certain things everyone else is doing OR quickly give them a shot (e.g. oil pulling), realize immediately they're not for me, and have zero desire to pursue them. There's a strange, subtle undercurrent of peer pressure (or maybe it should be called hive mentality) with friend groups and with bloggers when one person starts doing something trendy. I do sometimes miss out on cool things but I also think that I pursue enough new experiences that my life is full regardless.

Unknown said...

Yep, I've said that about a million times! LOL I think I get it from my Dad, actually :o)

Kate @ Another Clean Slate said...

Pointy shoes, skinny jeans, sock buns… all things I resisted at first too!

Amber Marie said...

We've discussed how much we are alike in this way…are we on a bandwagon of our own?! Oh my! ha ha!

Kate said...

Other than HP, it's scary how similar we are. It really, really is. Especially when it comes to matching clothes. I've gotten better about it, but I wanted to be different than EVERYONE.
If we all had to wear the same tshirt to school, I would "forget" it at home. Sometimes I even pulled the, "Oh I mean.. I had it on, but then I spilled something. Sorry guys! Guess I'll be the odd man out." I wanted to be different.
Even now, I refuse to put one of those big background-y pictures on my Facebook. (I don't even know what they're called. The header? Or something?) Because I'm a rebel.

But my all time worst offense? (Or non-offense?) Is pop music. I KNOW a lot of pop music because I'm around teenagers ALL THE TIME. But I hate the radio. I refuse to listen to it. In high school, even if I liked a pop band, I refused to admit it. I just can't handle it. Sometimes, it seems as if the more people LIKE something on the radio, the less I like it.

Kayla MKOY said...

Every other week Caleb and I go back and forth on getting rid of our smart phones! Go you!! This cracks me up and sometimes I've guilty of not doing things because it's the "cool thing", being the odd ball out is awesome ;)

julie said...

I'm the same way. If something starts to become hugely popular, I will grow to hate it until I just give in. It doesn't happen for everything though. I have not read any of the HP books and have only seen movies 1, 3 and a bit of the first part of 7. I am very stubborn about seeing Frozen because people won't stop saying "let it go" on their fb wall and I've grown to hate the phrase. My brother has posted that "look up" video 3 times to his fb wall, which is funny because he's been attached to a cell phone since he first got one however many years ago, but I still haven't watched it. I thought I would never get an Instagram account, but I finally gave in last year. I don't post pictures a lot and only check my feed every few days when I remember. So yes, I get stubborn about stuff that becomes popular and I don't want to do it, but sometimes I eventually will. My best stubborn story is that when the first Jurassic Park came out it was so popular I refused to have anything to do with it. When my family and I finally watched the movie I was hoping the kids got eaten by the T-Rex. lol I'm ok with the movie now though and actually like it.

Kerry @ Till Then Smile Often said...

I don't think I deny doing things because other people are doing it, but I will check something out if it got a lot of buzz. If it's not my thing like Frozen I'm just not going to watch it unless my nieces torture me into watching it.

17 Perth said...

Oh this is so good. And I'm so with you on so many fronts. I relate so much to that last paragraph. First off, I don't have Facebook. I, at first found it annoying when people would all the time say, "i saw on fb". And I thought, does anyone really communicate anymore or do they just stalk each other? Lol. Then, I just didn't want it because everyone else had it. And yes...that's in my blood too. However, i do have a smartphone. Haha. (We have been talking about getting rid of them.)

Anyways. Frozen? Haven't seen it and don't care. Lol. Twitter I have but don't use. Instagram now---love. :) I literally just got it though.

But, I do have that resistance in me. To be different. To not conform. I like to think it's not a bad thing. :)

Erika @ All Things E said...

Ooooh such wisdom. I used to really go the opposite direction - get into things early so that I'd never miss out. But now I'm like pumped when I go against the grain a bit. Conforming is BORING. Have been struggling with blogging on this one lately, for sure. SO envy your non-smart phone life. I think it'd be a shock to my system to quit it and honestly I just love texting too much to do it, even though I know it would be WAY better.

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