Give Me All the Condiments

6.18.2014


In my experience, there seem to be two types of people in the world: people who like condiments, and people who don't. Now, of course there are exceptions, but most of the people I know either pile on the condiments or choose the other option: to eat their burger, hot dog, burrito, taco, potatoes, etc., plain.

Beyond the many other things Jordan and I disagree on, we differ wildly in our thoughts about the deliciousness of condiments.

In my opinion, the more the better. In his opinion, I am insane for liking ketchup and mustard and relish and mayonnaise. Whatever, dude. 

There's actually a longstanding Reese family joke involving me and condiments that I will never be able to live down. We were in Chicago eating hot dogs at Portillo's, and I had so much stuff piled on mine that my bun fell apart, and everything fell onto my plate in a heap. I was distraught, as one would be if one's food had collapsed in on itself, and I started crying right there in the restaurant. 

Crying. 
Over a hot dog.

And let's just say I was not young when this happened. My brothers will not let me forget about it.

Anyway, the point here is not about the various times I've cried over spilled and/or burnt food (which is an embarrassing number of times). The point is that when it comes to summertime cookouts, I think condiments can make or break the meal.

Which is why when French's Yellow Mustard contacted me about a month ago to collaborate on a post featuring their mustard for their summer #NaturallyAmazing campaign, I was like, "Am I selling out by blogging about something as ridiculous as mustard?" But then I was like, "No I am not, because mustard is not ridiculous. Mustard is serious business." Take it from this Chicago girl: a Chicago-style hot dog without the mustard is not even worth eating.

French's was nice enough to send me a lovely gift basket with free mustard, which happened to work out perfectly, since I was down to the last squirt in my current mustard bottle. Blogging perks, I tell you.

Besides the mustard, they also sent me a collection of recipes featuring French's mustard, and this weekend I made one: Garlic Basil Mustard.


I chose this recipe, because it gave me an opportunity to use fresh basil from my new... basil plant! This is an exciting happening in my life right now: I have officially become a grower of things.

A few weeks ago I decided I was tired of being depressed that I don't have a yard to grow a garden in, and I went to Lowe's and bought myself some clay pots and two types of herbs, which are now perched on my porch and make me very happy to look at. 

Does this mean I have a green thumb now? Maybe I need to wait a few months and see if I can keep them alive and growing...

So I stepped outside, picked some leaves off my basil plant, whipped up some basil and garlic mustard, and took it over to my in-laws house for our Father's Day cookout this past weekend. Jordan's dad was grill master.


Personally, I liked the basil garlic mustard. It still had the signature mustard taste but with a bit of an extra kick because of the garlic and then some hints of sweet from the basil. (Plus let's be honest: it was fun to chop up fresh basil from my own plant.)

I honestly have never given mustard much thought before, but I love that French's Yellow Mustard is 100% natural, gluten free, and kosher. Plus, it has 0 calories. Holler! Unlike some mustards, there’s nothing artificial: no preservatives, fillers, or thickeners.

Click on the image below to follow French's on Pinterest! They just made a Pinterest board recently and would appreciate some love.

They have some great boards filled with recipes, kitchen hacks, and even this board for inspiration for a mustard-colored home, just in case you really love mustard yellow.

After lunch, I was able to snap a quick Father's Day picture of the Bumgarner boys with their dad. 

This is basically a miracle that they posed for an actual picture. Have you ever noticed how there are a bazillion pictures of my family on this blog and none of Jordan's family? Well, I've taken it as a personal challenge to rectify this situation starting now.

So now that you know my feelings about condiments, I want to hear from you. Let's take a poll: 
Do you like condiments? Which is your favorite? 
Most importantly... Have you ever cried because your food fell apart?
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*Disclaimer: This post was brought to you by the makers of French’s Yellow Mustard. I received compensation to write this post through the French’s #NaturallyAmazing Program, but all opinions expressed are my own.



Rachel said...

What a coincidence! Mustard is the only condiment I'll eat, and pretty much only on burgers and hot dogs. And I have definitely cried over food before....mostly over chocolate milk or a smoothie that had just been made that somehow spilled and exploded ALL OVER the kitchen which meant not only did I NOT get my tasty drink, instead of a good drink I have to clean the entire kitchen. That is definitely worth crying over. :P

Renee said...

Seriously, give me ALL the condiments. I've actually turned down food because of the restaurant not having certain condiments that go with the food. Sad, but true! You name the food, I have the perfect condiment pairing!! Tell me you put ketchup on your mac n' cheese??? :)

Becky said...

I do love condiments but a light amount of each. French's mustard is my favorite and now I want a soft pretzel to go with it!!

Blake - One Eighty Blog said...

BBQ sauce and honey mustard are my favorite condiments! I also like ranch, but only at random times. Like a BBQ Ranch Bacon Cheese Burger -- delicious (but pretty unhealthy!).

I can't remember a time when I cried because my food fell apart, but I can remember I once threw a temper tantrum and then refused to eat the food ahahha. I wasn't a kid either.

Jenn @ Optimization Actually said...

I came very close to crying over food. I was making hot cocoa in the microwave and I added the powder before heating the water - which evidently results in a chocolate volcano eruption. It had been a long day and I really just wanted a pick me up and to go to bed, not to scrub out the microwave. :P

Also, I am here to say that one can use condiments in moderation! I like them... sometimes. I do really like to use them for cooking though. And I am heavily considering trying to grow some of my own herbs and the fun you're having with it is convincing me that I should go for it.

Jenn | Business, Life & Design

Caroline @ In Due Time said...

YES! Ketchup nom nom!! We are about to start a new diet where I have to give it up though - it's going to be so sad!!!! I'm not sure how my husband is going to make it through!!

Marisa said...

I refuse to pick a favorite condiment, because like you, I load them on. While I have never cried from a goopy condiment mess that fell apart on my plate, I once overloaded a burger with 17 different sauces and condiments on a first date, and wore a lot of the resulting mess. Needless to say, there was not a second date. But I didn't care. CONDIMENT LOVE IS GREATER THAN THE LOVE BETWEEN TWO PEOPLE.

Kerry @ Till Then Smile Often said...

I am a condiment girl! I put ketchup on burgers and mustard on hot dogs!

Bailie @ The Hemborg Wife said...

Sometimes I have my grandma send me mustard from America and then my fridge will have mustard from there, mustard from where my husband is from, and french mustard!

Ali said...

I love condiments! I am a more-is-better girl too. Although I haven't cried over food yet. (Yet). I'm not sure I can pick an absolute favorite, because they're all so good on different things. Ketchup, mustard, mayo (not miracle whip tho!), relish, sour cream, etc., etc. Although I do have to say that I LOVE the tarragon sauce from Maggie's in Bayfield, WI. It's a dip for fries and whatever else, but it is soooo good!

Jenna Griffin | Gold & Bloom said...

Garlic...basil....mustard!? Oh my gosh, I'm drooling. I'm one of those people that LOVES dips. If CFA or Zaxbys forgets my sauces, I have no choice but to drive back to the restuarant and demand my sauce. It's intense.

Alicia | Jaybird: Home in Motion said...

Ooh I would be all over that basil garlic mustard! Your food photos are gorgeous and I appreciated your Chicago hotdog story. The first time I had one was at Eileen (Leaner by the Lake)'s place and it was a life changer. Why would I ever eat hotdogs without all those crazy-colored spicy pickle things ever again?! (Sidebar: how does a food have zero calories? What is mustard even made out of? I have questions!)

Jamie said...

hi-five for free mustard! I'm definitely a pro-allofthecondimentsplease person. my husband is a moderate condiment person, but loves to make fun of me because I salt and pepper everything, and am all about dipping sauces and extra pickles on top etc. I actually like mustard WAY MORE than ketchup and sometimes will eat fries just with mustard, though mixing mustard into ketchup [or mayo] is also a good way to go.

Sarah said...

My husband goes nuts for condiments, sauces and spices. The man can't get enough. We also rate restaurants based on their ranch...weird?!

Erin LFF said...

I am pretty boring. I'm always just a ketchup kinda girl-- and Jared thinks I'M WEIRD ;) I've never been a big mustard person, but your recipe for the basil garlic mustard sounds like something I'll have to try!

Kate said...

I'm a non-condiment kind of girl. I mean.. I might put some BBQ on a cheeseburger if I'm feeling frisky. The ONLY thing I'll put on a hotdog is chili. And I don't even like mustard unless it's honey mustard. Don't even get me started on mayonnaise. *shiver*

I think my parents almost had a heart attack the first time they saw me eat lettuce on a burger. Normally, it's bun, meat, cheese, bacon (when available).
I'm allllll about simplicity. I once tried to convince myself that I needed to force myself into eating condiments because it would be EASIER when ordering, buttttttttt I don't see a point into forcing myself into liking extra calories. Especially when I could just add a little extra cheese instead. ;)

Jenny Fish said...

I'm a zero-condiment kind if girl and mustard is definitely the worst of them all. But I've definitely cried over ruined food. Who wouldn't?

shelleystirs said...

I am all about the condiments. I didn't like mustard till I was an adult, though. Weird, right?

Kristin said...

I go for seasonings vs. condiments. I will salt, pepper, paprika, savory spice, and garlic the heck out of a dish. My husband, on the other hand, will drown his food in ALL the condiments. I know that whenever I make anything that can carry a sauce, I should just bring him the bottle. Because sometimes food really is just a delivery system for the sauce.

Our Pretty Little Girls said...

Ah that reminds me of an episode of Seinfeld. Where the girls hot dog falls apart and she starts crying over her frankfurter, baha ha! Man I love Seinfeld. I LOVE condiments. I have all the basics, jars of stuff that I can, and all kinds of fun stuff I buy. In fact I may have bought about 4 bottles of spicy ranch at Aldi the other day because they only get it a couple time a year.

Kayla MKOY said...

I'm ALL about the condiments, but not on the heavy side. I only like a little bit!! I never thought about a basil recipe for mustard, yum!!!

Unknown said...

I'm not so much about ALL the condiments, but I consider ketchup to be an absolute necessity in every kitchen, everywhere, no matter the meal. I find it appalling that anyone would consider eating a burger and French fries without ketchup...APPALLING! I put so much ketchup on my burgers, that they often end up in a rather large mess quite like the one you described :)

p.s. Have you tried ketchup with mac and cheese? Sounds weird, maybe? I thought so, too, until I tried it and my life was forever changed... I'm just sayin'

Unknown said...

I love condiments! Who doesn't like condiments! Come on people! I too, would have cried. For two reasons. 1.) I would have been distraught about loosing my food. I love food. I'm crazy about food. I want to eat all the food! 2.) I would have not been happy about getting food all over whatever I was wearing. It's not about being prissy about cloths. It's knowing you don't have an expendable income and there is not option of replacing an item if I ruin it.

The Lady Okie said...

Ketchup! I love it and completely agree with you about not understanding how anyone could eat a hot dog or burger without ketchup. Actually, I usually like to put ketchup on my burger AND dip my burger in ketchup, because duh.

The Lady Okie said...

"Because food is really just a delivery system for the sauce." I love it! So true.

The Lady Okie said...

Hahaha! You crack me up. But it's true.

The Lady Okie said...

Here is the ingredient list from the bottle: distilled vinegar, water, mustard seeds, salt, turmeric, paprika, spice, natural flavors, and garlic powder. Vegan and gluten free!

Allison said...

Um yes to all condiments! Haha. I agree with you, the more the better! I think I probably use way more ketchup than I should, but oh well. :)

Megan said...

I'm definitely in the "hater" category here. I don't like mayonnaise, mustard, ketchup or salad dressing—never have, ever since I was young. My mom calls me "un-American." I do, however, LOVE barbecue sauce. And guacamole (is that a condiment?). And now that I am older, I will have flavorful condiments on specialty items, like chipotle mayo or garlic aioli, but I still don't like your typical everyday condiments. Interesting debate! ;)

Food, Booze, & Baggage said...

Yes, the more condiments the better!! Most of the time I only eat french fries for the dipping sauces. I've never really thought about dressing mustard up before...interesting. I bet the garlic basil mustard would make a great vinaigrette.

Courtney Rose said...

This post is perfection!! I thought I was the only weirdo that was obsessed with condiments!! Some days I am eating chicken or something that obviously requires a condiment for dipping and just can't decide which one I am in the mood for. Come one come all!! Now I need to try this new mustard sauce - who knew?!

Unknown said...

My husband does not like mustard. He is weird. Mustard is delicious, and yes, even though I am a big fan of generic-label foods, I only use French's yellow mustard for hot dogs & hamburgers. I have fancy actual French mustard for sandwiches, though. ;)

Unknown said...

I always feel so bad about how hard I laugh at your stories where you cry or have some other misfortune. I suck...I'm a bad friend. Sorry.

I'm not big on mustard, however, I think I could like it a lot in that recipe! Yummmm!

Erika from America said...

I feel like people either love or hate mustard. My boyfriend doesn't like it but I am a HUGE fan of mustard -- and different kinds! Dijon, honey mustard. And French's tends to be my go-to mustard brand, too! And yum, that food looks good! Also, way to go on growing herbs! :)

Anonymous said...

So I'm pregnant right now, and ALL I want is mustard and relish. I LIVE for condiments. I was even able to find some all-natural, nitrate-free hotdogs; and you can believe that I SMOTHERED that dog in condiments. Ha, ha. This entire post made me crave some more relish and mustard! :)

Kym Fox said...

lol listen - I've blogged about toilet paper. But I guess that is serious business, too! I've never had a famous Chicago dog - we had a gourmet hot dog place in Denver that I still regret not going to! I'm a pretty simple mustard and relish kind of girl on my dogs but I'd love to switch it up with something full of condiment goodness!!

17 Perth said...

We can totally eat together. I am a condiment girl and I like variation! However, mayo is a big no thank u from me!

Jennifer Prod said...

giiirl, i don't even like mustard but i scrolled down (laughed and read and oohed and ahhed and laughed some more) and found myself wanting to put mustard on something (anything). we're the house that people bring their own condiments when invited over for a BBQ...

Laura Morgan said...

Fist bump to Jordan. I distrust sauces. They spread all over the other food, they hide sneaky things LIKE OTHER SAUCES, and they can be sticky. So, no.
I had a minor food-service gig in high school (I worked at a drugstore on Main Street that has a soda fountain...hello, I am from 1953), and I was admittedly terrible and making other people's food. They'd order a hot dog with ketchup and mustard; I would squirt a baby's pink finger-length of each—while grimacing because EW—and ask if that was too much. It never was.

Let me just say that your blog is so legit these days. Your pics look fantastic, and you are being contacted by true American brands. If I were to buy mustard, I would absolutely buy this one. In fact, Mike likes mustard and will probably convince Ava to try it (and then I will say, "Do you kiss your mother with that mouth? Not today you don't!"), so I will look for this one next time because if my family is going to consume this stuff, it might as well be not full of bad stuff and sold at something other than Whole Foods.

The end.

Julie @ Just the Joy's said...

Condiments are not my thing! Especially mustard and mayo. Barf city. Haha. But, ranch on the other hand... is my fav! On everything! Lots of it! :)

Amy said...

i AM ALL ABOUT THE CONDIMENTS man, mayo+ ketchup + mustard on a big ol' juicy burger..my mouth is WATERING!

The Lady Okie said...

Hey thanks, friend! SO LEGIT. Kind of. I mean, you know it's a legit post when it involves me telling a story about crying about food ;) But seriously. I actually had no idea mustard had a total of maybe 5 ingredients in it. So this post taught me something too. For zero calories, I don't feel that bad about putting it on my hot dogs!

Caitlin said...

Life isn't worth much without compliments... I mean, honestly! I'm a huge fan of Ketchup + use it on everything. Mustard's a close second + in the summer, it becomes a steep competition. The mustard recipe sounds so good!

Beka @ Sunshine to the Square Inch said...

Crying over food - completely normal! Except I usually cry when I'm tired and hungry / hangry! I think it's fun you got mustard through blogging! The perks of blogging!

Julia said...

i'm definitely a condiment lover, but my husband is not! i'm always trying to get him to try different sauces and dips and toppings and he's always telling me that "plain is better." haha we make quite the pair. ;)

this sauce sounds delish! i'll have to give it a try!

Holly said...

First of all--Portillo's is friggin' amazeballs and it's totally acceptable to cry over that messed up dog. Really. I would have done the same thing. I may not have cried in the past, but I know I've been annoyed when things fall apart!!

Second, I am not really a big yellow mustard fan. HOWEVER, I was raised in Cleveland where we've got Stadium Mustard (see here: http://www.stadiummustard.com/) and that stuff is the best ever. I also just love condiments--gotta have stuff on my burgers!!! Not so much a hot dog fan, unless it's with stadium mustard and onions :)

The Hungry Goat said...

I put vegenaise on all.the.things.

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