Things kicking my butt this week:
1. Daylight savings time
2. Recovering from my exhausting work trip last week
3. Going cold turkey on the pacifier
See also: being (nearly) 26 weeks pregnant
See also: being (nearly) 26 weeks pregnant
In hindsight, maybe it wasn’t the smartest decision to drop the paci this week, but it’s happening, and at this point there is no going back.
If there is one thing the Internet is undecided about, it’s when to drop the paci. Seriously, Google it yourself and see. I read the first two pages of articles and saw recommendations for anywhere from 4 months to 4 years. What I need is for someone to just tell me what to do already, but apparently there really is no all-in-one child-rearing book and you actually can just do whatever you want.
I’m not mature enough to have to make these kinds of decisions.
The one consensus, it seems, is that it’s easier to drop the paci sooner rather than later, when they are older and more stubborn about it. So why are we dropping the paci now at nineteen months? Well, I’ll tell you.
We have four pacifiers, and at some point a few months ago we straight up lost one, so we had three. I realize we should have probably had more than four to begin with, but just go with it.
On the Sunday after I came back from my work trip, Jordan informed me that R had chewed through one. She likes to hold it in the side of her mouth sometimes, and I guess she bit a little too hard and the end came off (halfway off, anyway, but still). I found the third paci under her crib, but right before I gave it to her, I looked at it, and it had some kind of mold/snot/liquid inside of it. Totally gross. Don’t judge us. So we tossed that one, obviously, and then there was just one left.
Except we couldn’t find it.
We searched in all the pockets of everywhere, the car, her backpack, my purse… gone. At that point the only option was to either drive to the store and buy more or just tell R that the paci went bye-bye and have that be the end of it. I thought of some better reasons why now would be a good time to drop the paci anyway, but the real reason is that we were just too lazy to drive to the store and buy more.
Poor R didn’t get any warning, no countdown, just paci go bye-bye.
She hasn’t used it since Saturday night, and dare I say it? We might be making progress.
Sunday afternoon she refused to lie down for her nap, and I ended up rocking her for two hours. Sunday night she screamed bloody murder for a solid half hour while Jordan and I took turns going in to pat her and tell her the paci was gone but she was a big girl and could sleep without it. I felt horrible, especially since I’d just been gone from her for four days and now I was back to torture her by taking her paci away.
Sunday night she woke up twice in the middle of the night, both times for over an hour and both times standing up in her crib screaming, only stopping if one of us held her. On Monday I took her to daycare and told them we didn’t have any pacis and to try and get her to nap without one and… good luck? They said she did take a nap eventually, but it was short and she only went to sleep after they swaddled her and rocked her.
Monday night as we prepared R for bedtime, Jordan and I gave each other pep talks to stay strong and went over our plan for the inevitable middle-of-the-night wakeup. She screamed for her paci three times at 1:00, 3:30, and 5:00, and we took turns going in there to reassure her that she was okay.
Yesterday it took her an hour to fall asleep at daycare (bless them), but miracle of miracles, at bedtime she only cried for about five minutes before falling asleep and, most shocking of all, she didn’t wake up once in the night! I really don’t want to be too optimistic, but I feel the worst of it might be over. (Unless pacifier regression is a thing? Don’t tell me about it, if it is.)
She knows that the paci always sits on top of her dresser, and so every night and every morning, we wave bye-bye to the paci together, and she says, “Bye-bye, buba.” I think she’s getting the idea that the paci is really gone!
As with everything about raising a child, Jordan and I have absolutely no idea what we are doing, and everyone will have different opinions about this, none of which are wrong. But I do feel confident in our decision to go cold turkey on the paci. She seems to be moving in the right direction, and hopefully her naps and bedtimes will improve until she’s mostly back to her normal sleeping habits where we can put her down and she will fall asleep on her own. I guess we will see!
But I will be happy to have gotten rid of the paci before Baby Boy arrives in June. I feel like if she were still using one and saw the baby using one, it would be much harder.
I just think maybe next time we won’t drop the paci on the same weekend I come back from a work trip on Saturday at 11:00pm and the same weekend as Spring Forward. This might, however, be a good time to start drinking coffee.
Because this week is kicking. my. butt.
DID I JUST WRITE AN ENTIRE BLOG POST ABOUT A PACIFIER.
What is my life right now.