My Most Embarrassing Moment. EVER.*

[Image via my favorite Website of all time: someecards]

*This post is rated PG-13. You have been warned.
(Especially you, Dad. Look away now.)

I previously shared this post about my embarrassment surrounding sexual innuendoes. You might want to read that first so you can understand where I'm coming from. 

In summary:
Awkwardness = 1 | Me = 0

In that post, I mentioned my most embarrassing moment, but I didn't go into detail. Mostly because I don't want some weirdo Googling this certain thing and finding my blog. But I think we're past that now. 

Someone recently found my blog Googling "38DDD breasts." I don't even want to know. Pretty sure I hit rock bottom on that one. I mean, have you seen me? 
Ahem.

I don't even know what post would come up unless you're on page 107 of the Google search.

[Image via someecards]

Anyway, I'm stalling. Here's the story of my most embarrassing moment.

Spanish class. 
Junior year of high school. 
We're going around the room taking turns translating verbs out loud from Spanish into English. 
I am given this word: fingir. 

Spanish translation: to pretend

NEVER IN MY LIFE will I forget what this word means, even if I forget everything else I ever knew about the Spanish language. 

What I said: to finger

TO FINGER.
I said this. Out loud. In front of 30 teenagers. Even my teacher burst into laughter. 

And the best part is, I had no idea what I'd even said. 

I did not know what that meant and therefore didn't know why everyone was laughing. I remember looking around the room and feeling confused. My friend Alison (whom I am still friends with, btw) leaned across the aisle and whispered, "I'll explain it to you later." Bless her.

I didn't know what it meant, but I knew it wasn't good. 
Someone kill me.

It's ten years later, and I still want to die of embarrassment just thinking about it. That story pretty much sums up my life in high school. And married life. 

Remember the scrotum story? I suppose that would count as an embarrassing moment too, except I have no shame. Jordan's mom nearly died laughing when she read that one.

Have you ever had a mishap with verb translation?
No? Just me then? Okay.