An Elbow to the Face

2.18.2015

Me: Remember, we're getting each other cards for Valentine's Day.
Jordan: What? I thought we weren't doing anything! 
Me: Well, we're getting cards. We do that every year. 
Jordan: *giant sigh* Fine. I'll get you a card.

On Saturday, Jordan and I drove to Target together to buy each other cards for Valentine's Day. But instead of buying them, guess what we did? We picked them out, showed them to each other, and put them back. Then we bought ice cream with the $6 we saved. Genius.

So that's how we did Valentine's Day this year. 
Then I had a Chinese food take-out baby. 
Because egg rolls.
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Jordan: Do you remember what happened last night?
Me: That depends.
Jordan: When I came to bed, you were already sleeping. I leaned over to kiss you, and you rolled over and elbowed me in the face.
Me: Oops. Yeah, I don't remember that at all.
Jordan: Well it hurt.
Me: Well it's weird to apologize for something I didn't know I was doing, but I'm sorry.
Jordan: I accept your apology.
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Jordan: You're usually really loud in the mornings, so this morning when I didn't hear you stomping around, I thought maybe you'd fallen asleep in the chair in the living room. I got worried you were going to be late, so I tried calling your name to wake you up.
Me: I definitely wasn't asleep, and I didn't hear you calling my name.
Jordan: Well I was too tired to call loudly, so I just kind of whispered it.
Me: Well that's not helpful.
Jordan: Yeah, well then right after that I heard you banging around again like normal so I went back to sleep.
_________________

Me: Have you eaten any of the ice cream?
Jordan: You mean the half gallon of ice cream we bought yesterday? No.
Me: Are you serious? But it's almost gone.
Jordan: Well I guess that means you ate it all.
Me: Can you just lie and tell me you ate some so I feel better?
Jordan: Yeah, you're right. I totally ate some.
Me: Awesome.
^^^ Posted this on Twitter on Saturday with the caption: Trying to take a Valentine's Day selfie with my new iphone. #nailed it

You guys, he gets me.

48 comments:

  1. When we used to go to Target, not like we have some stance about it now but you know it is not in Sweden, if I lost Fredrik I could always find him reading cards. Then he would have to show me all the ones he thought were really funny.

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  2. These are hilarious.
    Would not be mad if you posted more of this kind of content :)

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    1. Glad you enjoyed it! Thanks for leaving a comment!

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  3. You know how all couples think they're hilarious? You guys actually are. This made me smile. :) Oh, and I love the thing with "exchanging cards" without buying them! Maybe I'll ask Ryan to belatedly send me a picture of the sort of card he probably would have picked out if we did that sort of thing.

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    1. Ha! That is too funny. I DO think we're hilarious, but it's nice to have outside validation :) Isn't that card idea genius? It was my friend's idea, actually, and I thought it was kind of awesome.

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  4. Never have you so perfectly described marriage as in this post. Also, the card idea--genius.

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    1. It was my friend's idea, and I thought it was kind of awesome. I mean cards are expensive! haha :)

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  5. you guys are so precious. haha. i'll choose ice cream over card anytime.

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  6. Do you know that Target FAILED in Canada? What is wrong with us?!

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  7. Your sleeping habits are hilarious. I remember you posting a few more episodes of you accidentally hitting/kicking Jordan. And that Valentine's selfie? It's perfect! Ladies and gentlemen, this is what marriage looks like. Loved this post!

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  8. True love!! "Well that's not helpful" Haha!

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  9. hahaha. what a great idea. you guys are awesome. way to use your money wisely :)

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  10. I want to live next door to you guys. You could always blame Kevin for eating the ice cream because, well, he can't stop himself.

    Also - genius with the Valentine's cards. Saves money and supports the "going green" efforts.

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  11. Haha! You guys are so great. Love this.

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  12. haha i love this post! you guys sound similar to me and my husband. my husband has elbowed me in the face (asleep) before, and he's also rolled over on top of me. now i just elbow him back. lol

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  13. This is HILARIOUS! I think my favorite is him whispering your name to make sure you were awake.. hahahaha.

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  14. LOVE IT! Hahahahaha that sounds like my house, but we take turns blaming things on the dogs.

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  15. Picking out a card and putting it back is kind of genius!! Love it! You two sound hilarious and perfect for each other!

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  16. HAHA so hilarious! Sounds like me and Mark most of the time. <3

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  17. Hahahaha. Not buying the cards is absolutely brilliant, I think we need to get in that train. Also, on an unrelated note, you were totally right about parks & rec- it took me a few episodes to get into it but now I laugh loudly at each one. Thanks for the recommendation!

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    1. Glad you're enjoying it! It took me a few episodes, but now I love it. Also, if this tells you anything about Jordan, he is convinced that Ron Swanson is his spirit animal :)

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  18. YES! I love how you're keeping it real with some true bits of Valentine's Day. If he's not writing a sweet message on the inside of the card, I'd choose ice cream any day.

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  19. Haha we saved money on cards, chocolates and flowers and went out for a drink instead ;)

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  20. Dude, that picture is terrible. "Keeping it real" I guess.

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    1. IF by terrible you mean awesome, then yes.

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  21. That's the most brilliant way of doing cards ever.

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  22. This is hilarious! Ice cream always trumps cards.

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  23. Oh my goodness, this is hilarious! You two! It's good you have each other. :) And your Target card idea is genius! I'll have to tuck that one away for later. :)

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  24. I enjoyed reading this so much; thanks for the laughs! :) Your idea of shopping for cards but not buying is genius!

    I don't know why, but I never saw Valentine's Day as a mushy, commercial holiday. I think I still have that childlike perspective. I always think of little notes from my mom, EVERYONE in the classroom receiving a valentine, and just appreciating loved ones.

    P.S. Noticed a parks and rec reference in the comments. Best show everrrrrr...which reminds me. I've got an episode to catch up on! ;)

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  25. I think this one needs to go in the record book for one of the best blog posts ever... Just saying.

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  26. Oh goodness, you two are HILARIOUS. I always love reading little quotes and such like this on blogs because it reminds me just how funny life is and how we have to take time to remember it all. Thank you for bringing some smiles into my evening! :)

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  27. You two are fun! I'm glad you write this down because it will be fun to look back on and remember. I think I'd pick a card though over ice cream but that is because I'm a sucker for cards of any kind! I like the cheap ones too or even and made ones.

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  28. You two are hilarious! I love this!

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  29. I can't with you two. It's too much awesome.

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  30. Oh my gosh, I just died laughing at the selfie. You're so funny! Food > cards ;)

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  31. Hahaha. This post cracked me up. And the selfie is amazing!!

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  32. These cracked me up! The card thing is TOTALLY genius!

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  33. Cards are so dang expensive so I might have to steal your idea. ;) And that Valentine selfie...nailed it. Haha. Hilarious.

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  34. Everyone should follow your footsteps when it comes to Valentine cards. Genius.
    You guys are awesome.

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  35. I didn't think I could love you any more...but it's happened. I love that y'all just showed each other the cards, put them back, then bought icecream and takeout! That's so smart and really funny.
    That selfie is one for the books!

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  36. Haha I LOVE your Valentine's card exchange. And the elbow to the face! I do crazy things in my sleep too, but I think my husband is mostly unphased by them now haha. Have a great weekend Amanda! :)

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  37. Thanks for a good laugh!!! You guys are the best! My Mom and I sometimes pop over to the card isle and "swap" cards. I have no idea how that got started....But, it's fun and CHEAP! :)

    It's alll about the egg rolls. And the fried rice. YUM!

    He definitely ate the ice cream....And the whispering?!?! Good thing!!! That's something I would do...It makes perfect sense!

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  38. I literally laughed out loud at this. Your sleeping habits sound like mine -- my husband usually gets up and leaves for work before I get up, and sometimes I'll say that evening "You know, I have no memory of you leaving this morning," and he'll say, "Really? You gave me a kiss and said see you tonight." And I'll say "Uh...nope."

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  39. Love your exchanges...this definitely had me laughing. :)

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  40. You guys are just the best :)

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  41. I just laughed really hard through this entire post, so thank you.

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