It's a Boy!

2.23.2020


We are so incredibly thankful to share the safe arrival of Baby BOY Bumgarner on Tuesday, Feb 18, 2020, at 10:42 pm. This was by far my shortest labor at just about 8 hours, and we couldn't be more excited to welcome Baby F to our family.

Birth story to come! We took Fresh 48 pictures at the hospital, and our photographer was honestly the absolute sweetest. Below is a sneak, and I can't wait to see the rest! Thank you for praying for us during this pregnancy. There just really aren't words for how blessed I feel to be gifted this sweet little life.


Let People Help You

2.06.2020


Last week was, shall we say, not the best.

I mentioned in a previous post that I had the flu last week, which I don't think I've had before and it was so awful. I don't know if it was more the flu itself or the fact that I was 37 weeks pregnant or a combination (probably a combination), but I felt completely miserable.

While that was going on, Jordan got whipped in the eye with a giant piece of wire at work and had to go to the emergency room and then see an eye doctor. For two days he couldn't see, and I had to lead him around the house like he was a blind person. I got cold rags for his eye and gave him his antibiotic drops, and I had the flu, so it's not like I was feeling 100% myself. A few people told me that they were surprised how well I was taking it, but honestly I  just kept laughing because it was so ridiculous.

R also spent a full day throwing up on Wednesday, and once was in the car with me when I was headed home from picking up my Tamiflu prescription. I think it was a random virus thing, and she was okay the next day, but I called my mom in actual hysterics while R was sitting in the backseat covered in vomit. That part I did not laugh about. I think we can all agree that vomit is never funny.

My personality is not one to suffer silently. I texted our family and friends about me having the flu and R throwing up and Jordan's eye, and I asked for prayer and vented because I'm a verbal processor and not an entirely private person. Some people are not those things, and it's uncomfortable for them to let others know when they are having a hard time. Neither way is wrong, just different, and to be honest I sometimes wonder if people think of me as a dramatic person or annoying for being so outgoing and open.

Jordan and I are extremely blessed with a really supportive and loving community. I know not everyone has that, and it's something I try not to take for granted. Jordan's mom was immediately open to helping out, taking the kids to stay at their house so they could hopefully avoid catching the flu from me. She drove Jordan to his eye doctor appointment because he couldn't drive himself, and I was still contagious and didn't feel like getting out of the house even if I could have.

Friends texted and asked what they could do for us. I had someone drop off a vanilla shake (totally hit the spot because my throat was aching so bad from all the coughing); another friend brought over a frozen lasagna and two cans of soup (so awesome because for a few days the sinus pressure made my jaw lock up and I could hardly open my mouth to chew anything). Another friend brought over some Gatorade (which Jordan and I both enjoyed since I was tired of just drinking water). Jordan's mom picked up a few things at the store for us and brought us leftover chicken tacos she'd made for dinner.

Gift giving is my top love language. I love sending mail, thinking of the perfect present for birthdays and Christmas, and showing people I'm thinking about them with the offer of a gift, big or small. I'm not in any way trying to pat myself on the back or ask for praise. I'm just saying that for me, gifts are  a way I love others, and receiving gifts is a way I feel loved myself.

I've found over the years that it can sometimes be hard to get people to accept help. I definitely think it helps to be specific (when this week can I bring you dinner? is much better than an ambiguous let me know if you need dinner.), but even then, people often say no. And as the person reaching out, this makes me sad! I'm asking because I do want to help. I want to bring you something. I want to make you feel loved and supported. When people say no, I think, Just let me do something, anything! 

But after last week, I have to say, I get it.

It's not uncommon to set up a meal train after someone has a baby or offer to bring a meal when someone comes home from the hospital after having surgery. That seems worthy of attention. But, honestly, I felt silly having a friend bring me a shake or soup just because I was sick. I felt like a problem asking Jordan's mom to watch my kids all week or pick him up to take him to the doctor. I felt like a whiner telling my friends about how bad I was feeling and how worried I was about Jordan's eye (he's mostly recovered! such an answer to prayer!).

I was so, so grateful for the support, but I felt like I was just being a problem.

I realized that's probably why people say no when someone offers to help. It's easier to say no than feel like a burden. You convince yourself that they didn't really want to help anyway, that they are just asking to be nice, and that you should be able to handle this on your own.

And sure, I could have handled last week on my own. I wasn't going to die if I didn't have a vanilla shake. I have things in my house I could have eaten other than soup. I could have gotten out and driven Jordan to the eye doctor by myself if there was no one else around. I technically didn't "need" anyone's help, but I'm glad I said yes.

Let people help you. That's what I learned last week.

It's vulnerable and awkward, but it also builds friendships and inspires community. Life isn't always easy, but I think we often make it harder than it has to be because we aren't always great at asking for or accepting help. 

There's a balance, of course. I don't want to be (I hope I'm not) the kind of person, the kind of friend, who is always complaining and negative about everything. We are all struggling, and we shouldn't be a burden to others by constantly asking for help over and over again. 

But it's okay that sometimes it's just nice when someone stops by with a can of Campbell's soup and a bar of chocolate. It doesn't mean you're failing at life. It just means that you're sick and soup sounds really good and you don't happen to have any in your house.

New Big Kid Room + Guest Bathroom

2.01.2020


While I'm sitting here being quarantined, I thought I'd take a break from Netflix and share some house updates! Nesting hit me hard and I spent basically all the fall and holiday months purging and cleaning and organizing all the things (not that you could tell if you came over right now, but we won't talk about that).

As many of you know, R and J have been sharing a room since J was 6 months old (before that he was in a bassinet in our room). We had them in the nursery, which we painted mint green before R was born. My thought was to paint a gender neutral color so that the room could be adapted to a boy or girl later on, and so far it's been perfect! 

I still love the color, and we plan on keeping that room the nursery and putting Baby Bum there when he/she comes home. I haven't updated any artwork or basically done anything to the room since we had R, which honestly is fine with me. I like how the room looks and is set up.

We have a 3-bedroom house, and the back bedroom has been Jordan's man cave slash extra storage space since we moved in. We had a bookcase and Jordan's computer and desk in there, and my running goal was always to make sure everything was always at least somewhat organized so it wasn't just a total junk room.

When we started talking about a third baby, we knew we would need to make the back bedroom R and J's room so the baby could have the nursery. Jordan went through a bit of struggle giving up his man cave, but we eventually moved his desk/computer to the corner of the playroom, and I actually think it's been okay so far.

Once we moved Jordan's desk out, I went absolutely crazy cleaning and organizing the back bedroom. I completely cleared off the bookcase (which we moved into our bedroom), and I cleaned out the closet and unpacked every single box and bin we had in there. I made piles, and Jordan and I each went through all of our stuff to decide what to purge and what to keep. Then I bought clear bins and labels and organized everything into categories so that we knew exactly what was where. Some stuff went up in the attic, and other stuff got moved to the nursery closet, which is going to be half the baby's things and half storage, since the back bedroom is now R & J's closet with all of their stuff. 

I took a huge box of books to Half-Priced Books, donated giant bags of clothing, and threw away so much old crap that we shouldn't have even been keeping! It was awesome, but for a couple of months the house was a complete disaster (I mean a worse disaster than normal lol) because boxes and stuff were everywhere.

For a little while it felt like we were getting packages delivered every day. We had to buy two twin beds, two mattresses, and two sets of comforters, sheets, and pillows for both the kids in their new big kid room. I bought artwork (which I still need to hang up, but I'm waiting for my mom to come help me decide were it should go). I got them a new laundry hamper since they really didn't have one, bins for clothes, and more hangers for their closet. AND, last but not least, I bought paint!

This project was a true labor of love for both my parents, Jordan, and for me. I wanted something colorful, but I didn't love the idea of painting the entire room one color. I searched Google and Pinterest for "boy/girl shared kids room paint ideas" and found an idea of painting geometric squares that I instantly fell in love with. I showed it to Jordan and said I really really wanted to try and do this in the kids' room. I LOVE how it turned out! Like, it is exactly what I envisioned, and I'm obsessed with it.

From start to finish it took one evening to paint the gray/white walls, one entire day to paint the squares, and another entire day off and on doing touchup work. It was not a simple DIY, but I love it so so much. Here are a few pictures showing our progress!

All the nesting made me to want to redecorate other areas of the house, and I decided I really wanted to update our guest bathroom, which is the kids' bathroom! It's looked the same for a while, and I just wanted something fun and kid-friendly in there. I bought a new shower curtain, artwork, bathmat, and I had the kids make handprint art for the wall by the sink. It's so colorful in there, and I love it! 

Not for any reason other than I had the paint on hand, I used the same yellow, mint, and coral paint for their handprints in the bathroom as I did for the squares in the bedroom. The paint didn't cost that much actually because we were able to do all the squares using just one sample tin of each color, which cost about $5 at Lowe's! Then one gallon each of white and gray.

Now here is the part where I pretend to be an actual home decor blogger and share sources! ha ;) *some affiliate links are used below; I do get a few cents!

BEDROOM
Beds (twin)
Mattresses (twin)
R's comforter (geo print)
R's sheets (ballerina)
J's comforter (blue striped)
J's sheets (campout)

BATHROOM
Shower curtain (polkadot)
Bath mat (splish splash)

・ DESIGNED BY ECLAIR DESIGNS