37 Weeks with Baby Bum 3

1.30.2020


We took maternity photos at the beginning of January, and as usual I'm so glad we did. I debated about what to wear for a while but ended up going with jeans, booties, a t-shirt, and cardigan, and I'm really happy with how they turned out. I love taking maternity photos because it's such a special time, and I take advantage of the opportunity to get a few shots of each of the kids, our family, and Jordan and I together.

I've felt so thankful for a routine, healthy pregnancy so far, but this past weekend I came down with what I thought was a terrible head cold only to find out that I somehow contracted THE FLU. I don't think I've ever had the flu before, and let me tell you it's awful. If no one else in my house catches it, it will be a miracle considering I showed symptoms for 3 days before I went to the dr to get tested. Not because I was trying to put everyone at risk but because I honestly thought it was just a bad cold!

I mean, can anyone really say "achy" is an abnormal symptom at 36.5 weeks pregnant? The dr was like, do you feel achy? Um, YES WHY DO YOU ASK. I tried to roll out of bed last week and got the worst side cramp of my life. I'm peeing every 8 seconds and basically need to just move my desk into the bathroom at this point. Oh yes, and the waddling is very real. 

Totally over all of it.

I was supposed to have my 37wk checkup today, but of course they said not to come in since I'm contagious with the flu, so I guess I'll just wait and see what's up with Baby Bum next week. R came at 38w5d, so that's like a week and a half from now IT'S FINE. The infant car seat is in the attic covered in dust but anyway.


I never once worried about how R was going to do once J came around, but I have to say, I am a little anxious about this little guy now that he's about to become a big brother. He still asks me to hold him constantly, wants Mama around always, and can be pretty aggressive, so I'm just not sure. I hate to be annoying and say it's a boy thing, but we have definitely noticed that for our kids, at least, J is much more aggressive and physical than R was at this age. But he is also so sweet and is saying more and more words and sentences every day. He's hilarious! My MIL has been watching him since I found out that officially and the flu, and I haven't even seen him in almost two full days now. I miss his sweet face!

It's strange to me that people know the gender of their babies and can call them by name before they are born. I sometimes forget that we knew with R and J! Not knowing honestly hasn't been that hard, but as my due date gets closer I am getting so excited to see who has been in there this whole time. Of course, I'd like Baby Bum to wait just a bit until I get over the flu... and until we solidify our name choices. Ha! What is wrong with us? I think we've decided on 2 girl names to choose from, and I think we have a boy name we both like, but we can't come up with a good middle name yet.

Among other things I'm feeling anxious about is going on maternity leave and then going back to work. I've done it twice, so obviously I have an idea of the challenges and how it works, and I know I can survive it and will figure out a good routine. But that will take time, and I just really dread the process of a new routine, because going back to work has been so hard for me both times, and I don't expect it to be magically easier this time.
Pregnancy is such a long process, from trying to get pregnant to getting pregnant to being pregnant to having a baby to recovering from having a baby. By the time it's almost over, I do want it to be over, but I also find that, for me at least, it's also really hard for everything to be over. Because there isn't anymore this One Big Thing you're focusing on but just that thing called life, which is beautiful and wonderful but also pretty hard sometimes.

Every time I think about actually having this baby I get surrounded by a swirl of emotions and usually end up crying. Happiness and anxiousness and excitement and gratefulness and also, I admit, fear because I really really want to be able to bring my baby home, and it's just a fact that not everyone gets to. SO. On that happy note (I'm just a treat to be around right now!), I'm going to get some more tea, blow my nose 800 more times, and sit on the couch while Baby Bum moves around--on the inside for now, but very soon (though not too soon, please!) to be on the outside.

Kaity said...

I love those family pictures so much!!

Katie @ Live Half Full said...

These pictures are amazing! You all look so happy. I cannot WAIT to find out what you have!

AnneMarie said...

Those pictures are so, so sweet :) I hope that you get better soon, and that the baby waits to come out until you're back in good health!

I don't really know what's just "a boy thing" and what's not, since I only have boys, but when I gave birth to my second, my firstborn definitely had a few days of complete meltdowns and aggression (mainly when my husband went back to work). But he made it through and is now obsessed with his little brother. J might have some tough days, but he'll get through it too! You're a great mom, and I think your support and love will certainly be an anchor for him amid all the changes and transitions :)

Beka @ Sunshine to the Square Inch said...

First off, I'm really sorry you got the flu. I hope you get better soon. The photos - I love them!!!! They look great and I'm glad you capture baby Bum 3!

Betsy Transatlantically said...

I can't even imagine getting the fly while pregnant. I had it 6 or 7 years ago, pre-kids and before Jon moved over, and my mom had to take Charlie until I got better because I couldn't even take care of the dog. I cannot IMAGINE oy vey. I hop you feel better soon and that Baby Bum stays inside until then!

Michelle said...

Your pictures are beautiful! I know what you mean about being ready for pregnancy to be over but also not wanting it to be over. I know this is my last one, so I’m clinging to it even though the physical discomfort this time has been through the roof. Mixed feelings! So many of them!

Rach said...

Oh my goodness! The flu!! That's awful. I'm so sorry to hear this. Hopefully you are much better by now and your family managed to miraculously miss it. And hopefully you land on the perfect name soon! :)

Rach said...

Oh! And obviously, gorgeous photos!! :)

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