National Infertility Awareness Week

4.27.2016


Today I want to talk about National Infertility Awareness Week, which is happening this week, April 24-30. 

If you are new to this blog, you may not know that Jordan and I visited with an infertility doctor and went through a round of ovulation medicine before getting pregnant with R. Not one single day goes by that I don’t thank God for the gift of our precious baby and the fact that we were able to get pregnant so quickly once on the medication.

There are so many couples who desperately want to have a baby and have been struggling with infertility for months and even years. I will not claim to know the pain that comes from that kind of waiting, but I experienced just a taste of it myself, and my heart has remained sensitive toward the women who continue to pray for their miracle babies.

I wonder why God allowed me to have a healthy pregnancy when there are women around the world who would be wonderful mothers and haven’t been able to conceive yet. I pray for them by name when I hear of them. I pray for healing. I pray for peace and comfort. I pray for joy in the waiting.

One thing you may not know about infertility treatments is that currently only 15 out of 50 US states provide insurance coverage. We paid out of pocket to consult with the infertility doctor, get blood tests and ultrasounds, and buy the ovulation medicine. These things are not cheap, and that’s not even close to what the people who go through rounds of treatment for months and years have to pay out of pocket.

My insurance denied anything marked “I” because infertility treatments are considered an “elective” procedure, akin to a nose job or something. It’s hurtful and insulting, not to mention incredibly stressful. I actually had to fight my insurance on two different bills each over $400 for blood work that was taken after I got pregnant. The office mistakenly marked it with the wrong code, and my insurance denied it because it was marked infertility.

Babies are everywhere you go, on practically everything you see. Every time you see a pregnancy announcement, you feel equal parts happiness for your friend but also jealousy and even bitterness that you are still waiting.

I hate that anyone has to feel like that.

National Infertility Awareness Week is timed to occur just before Mother’s Day. It’s a reminder that before the day when we celebrate moms and all they do, we should to remember those who aren’t moms yet but so desperately want to be.

I want them to know that they aren’t forgotten and they aren’t alone, and they are beautiful, wonderful women.

Being a mother doesn’t make you better; it doesn’t make you more important. What it should make you is thankful for the precious children you were given to raise. 

And it should make you more sensitive toward those who are still waiting for theirs.

*You can go here to find out more about NIAW. Use the hashtag #StartAsking on social media to learn more too!
Ashley said...

I can't believe insurance doesn't usually cover this kind of medical treatment. How sad. Thank you for sharing this.

Ashley H said...

Well said.

xo

Anna said...

That was really well put. We were so fortunate not to have any issues getting pregnant with P and have never taken that for granted. I can't imagine how hard it must be for those that struggle.

Anna said...

That was really well put. We were so fortunate not to have any issues getting pregnant with P and have never taken that for granted. I can't imagine how hard it must be for those that struggle.

Brandi said...

I didn't know about your struggles. We charted for months to a year to conceive our first three kids. That kind of want for a baby, especially when you hear of abuse or neglect (and sadly, yes, sometimes another's pregnancy), is a pain like no other.

Rach said...

Love that you have such a heart for those who are hurting and waiting! You are a sweet soul, Amanda!

Andrea H. said...

Thank you for sharing your story, Amanda! I have heard of so many in similar situations. I truly can't imagine. I often pray for those battling with infertility issues as well as that we will have a positive experience with conceiving once we begin our journey toward parenthood. I really appreciate your heart to bring awareness to this topic!

Beka @ Sunshine to the Square Inch said...

I wonder why insurance doesn't pay for things like that? It is kind of terrible because many pay for abortions. So messed up.

I'm thankful God provided R for you and your family. I'm not glad you went through that trial but I am glad that through it you have a tender heart towards others and can pray for them.

Courtney said...

Yes, yes, yes. Jim and I were just talking the other night about how long it took us to pay off all of our infertility bills- and we still left empty handed and broken hearted from the experience. It's awful.

Great post!

Caroline @ In Due Time said...

Thanks for sharing and bringing awareness. The amount that people spend is sickening, especially when they end up empty handed. And I can't imagine going through all the treatments, spending $100k+ and then starting your family in such debt. Anyway. I am glad you posted about this topic, because it's near and dear to my heart (duh). So glad you got your miracle <3 And, a cute one too ;)

Sara Oss said...

I did some research and my state is not one of the 15, which didn't surprise me because we're a small state. What did surprise me is that a bill has been brought up twice (!) that would mandate including infertility treatments and both times the bill has included a morality clause (must be married and infertility must not be the result of an STD) that would have been a total poison pill in my very progressive and non-religious state. Thanks to your post I'm off to do some research and figure out what went down and why they chose that same language both times.

Erin LFF said...

Beautifully written and such a positive reminder for everyone out there, no matter the situation they're in. So many dear family members and friends of mine are still waiting to become mothers and my heart is heavy for them around mother's day especially.

Amy @ A Desert Girl said...

Your heart and love for those who are in this struggle is inspiring. I'm so glad that you have your miracle baby in R. <3

Julie | A Hopeful Hood said...

I am so glad you bring this up this aspect of Mother's Day that is coming...that there are women who want to be moms but aren't (yet!!!). As a new mom with friends who have been trying for a while, it's really difficult to know how to act around them. I really appreciate your insight on this topic!

Laura | Making Baby Provence said...

This is just excellent. I like how you equate infertility treatments to a nose job in the eyes of the insurance company. That made me do a little snort laugh. I appreciate how grateful you are for R. I'm glad you're an infertility success story. *Hugs*

Julie @ Just the Joy's said...

Amen! My heart hurts for the couple's that struggle with infertility. I wouldn't wish it upon my worst enemy. Being able to become a mom is truly one of the biggest blessings and miracles I could ever ask for!

Jenny Evans said...

I didn't know that you'd had infertility treatments before having R! Some of the things insurance does and doesn't cover make absolutely no sense.

For example, with childbirth, I still don't get how most insurances don't cover a $600 doula (who often helps women avoid medications or procedures during labor that end up costing the insurance company money) but if I were to walk into my OB's office tomorrow and request an elective C-section over labor (even though it costs $1000s of dollars more,) it would be completely covered.

・ DESIGNED BY ECLAIR DESIGNS